Arsenal Ladies and England footballer Casey Stoney

Published: 12 June, 2015
by RICHARD OSLEY

IT’S a shame that the Women’s World Cup is not getting more play in our national newspapers. More often than not it has been a brilliant, enthralling watch in its first week. Sweden versus Nigeria was a 3-3 thriller, the Costa Ricans were feisty when claiming a draw against the pass-and-move skills of Spain, and Germany were ­breath­taking against Ivory Coast, not settling until they hit double figures.

Some of these games really should not be concealed behind the red button – a hiding place usually reserved for a hipster guitarist in a Glastonbury tent going acoustic for a fawning disc jockey in wellies.

Nor should some of them only be online, as sterling as the BBC’s commitment has been to providing us with as much of the action as possible.

One day, let us hope that the Women’s World Cup gets the full works. Presenter Jacqui Oatley should have a studio as big as Gary Lineker’s face, when he grins, out there. She is anchoring from this country when we want her out there. Back home, we should have flags in the windows, if you are partial to that sort of thing during the men’s version. Put on order: Facepaint, chain mail fancy dress and a foil cut-out trophy. There should be ribbons on cars. There should be news stories about the millions of pounds that will be wiped off the economy because workers have been rendered useless by staying up all night to watch the United States versus Australia. 

The players should be better known than thingybob who you guessed played for Arsenal Ladies but is actually at Notts County. In the stadium, there should be a parping brass band riffing The Great Escape. We should be ­watching this stuff as a nation. 

There should be zoomed in pictures of the HABs. And, you know, it’s also okay to think any of the players you think are good looking are good looking, as long as this isn’t your only comment on their contribution to the finals. It doesn’t make you sexist, in the same way your girlfriend used to fancy Robert Pires or David Beckham more than you. Or Phil Neville.

But you must also appreciate the way they play too, because apart from some ropey goalkeeping, these women are super talented and have an ability to amaze and entertain.

Look up Holland’s goal against New Zealand, or Colombia’s goal against Mexico, if you still do not believe.

The great disappointment of the tournament also bears a frighteningly resemblance to what the cavemen readers out there would call “the real thing”, but metropolitan ‘ol me knows to refer to as the men’s World Cup. That’s England. Just like the men, the women looked quite hopeless in their first match. They were sluggish and devoid of a clear gameplan other than whacking the ball long to a single striker who hardly had a glimpse of goal. 

Just like Hodgson’s confused charges last summer, England looked out of place in a tournament bursting with goals and goodness.