Illustration by John Sadler – with apologies to Courbet www.johnsadlerillustration.com 

• WITH more and more people using public spaces for daily exercise since the pandemic, I am finding it harder and harder to stick to the basic rules of street etiquette I learned when I first came to London many years ago.

These were very simple and stood us all in good stead for many years. Indeed they were one of the main reasons I never went back up North, where the friendliness was suffocating.

When out and about in the streets or even walking the Heath, avoid all eye-contact with anybody but your next-door neighbours or very close relatives.

If accidental eye contact is made, either maintain a blank expressionless visage or bend down and pretend to tie up your shoelaces.

Under no circumstances engage in conversation with anybody. Always have a non-committal shrug ready for anybody who actually asks you a question.

Nowadays I have to skulk in doorways or in the shrubbery when I see a familiar figure jogging towards me so that I can avoid his habitual intrusive nod of greeting.

And I swear some of the dog-owners have trained their pooches to run at me excitedly and jump up so that they can say: “Ooooh, she’s just being friendly!”

Come on, now, people! Have some dignity! Let’s stop this slide into inappropriate familiarity!

RB BLACK, NW3