The Zetter in Clerkenwell is a new breed of restaurant and hotel, writes Kim Janssen. Just leave your monkey at home

HOTELS ain’t what they used to be. Gone, it seems, are the days when you could slip gracefully out of your horse-drawn carriage, spin through a gilded revolving door, glide across a deep-pile ruby red carpet followed by a retinue of obsequious Pee-wee Herman look-a-likes carrying your matching fur luggage, march up to the concierge and demand to be carried with your pet monkey to your champagne bath.
I say ‘it seems’ because I couldn’t quite pluck up the courage to try the above out at The Zetter, Clerkenwell’s newest and hippest hotel and restaurant in Clerkenwell Road.
Described, somewhat irritatingly, as a ‘boutique’ hotel and full of skinny people with artful facial hair and more money and class than me, I didn’t think that kind of extreme behaviour would go down at all well.
For all its loud wallpaper and young attitude, it’s still a place for people of discretion.
Besides, I’d come on the bus and I didn’t have a room booked. I just wanted a chance to try the restaurant all the critics have been raving about.
The rooms – I was shown them, although they wouldn’t let me stay, perhaps fearing what my monkey and I would do to the place – have a modern, Ikea-ish look to them. They wouldn’t look out of place in the pages of Wallpaper magazine, or in, well, an Ikea catalogue.
Reasonably priced, by the standards of central London, at between £110 and £329, the themed rooms come with internet access, cable TV, DVD players and fashionable Japanese snacks – some even have a few dog-eared Penguin paperbacks thrown in.
The temperature of the building is controlled by roof ducts which open and close as the weather dictates – a nice touch, which, along with the genuine and ancient well in the basement which supplies all of the hotel’s water, helps dispel that sterilised sense that infects some of the larger, more faceless chains.
Whatever the merits of the accommodation, which is primarily intended for business travellers, it’s the restaurant which will draw in the locals.
Chefs Megan Jones and Cameron Emirali cook Italian food with a new world touch. The emphasis is on strong – very strong – flavours and simple, unstuffy presentation. At around £80 for dinner for two with wine, it’s neither cheap nor ruinously expensive, given the standard of cooking and ingredients.
My starter of artichoke, chilli, lemon and parsley salad with parmesan was delightfully fresh and perhaps the most subtle dish on the menu; the artichoke was shaved into crisp, savoury shards while the lemon and chilli lent a delicate, rather than overpowering edge.
My dining companion’s apparently cautious starter of bruschetta turned out to be inspired, too.
The top notch buffalo mozzarella – the best I’ve ever tasted – came on tasty home-baked, chargrilled toast, but it was the addition of barely cooked, crunchy peas that surprised.
My companion hated them but, once I got over the shock of a crunchy pea, I found them moreish. Our mains of rib-eye steak and grilled whole sea bream were less imaginative but no less tasty.
The fresh sea bream was moist but firm with a garlic and balsamic vinegar sauce, while the steak had a charry hint and came with the same roast peppers as the fish.
A passion fruit gelato was the perfect light desert, while the well water added a nice authentic touch. Recommended, all in all, if you prefer friendly and unpretentious service to the full penguin suit traditional dining experience.

• The Zetter Restaurant and Rooms;
86-88 Clerkenwell Road, EC1;
Restaurant reservations: 020 7324 4455;
Room reservations: 020 7324 4444.

• In last week’s Good Life feature on the Flask pub in Highgate we described it as the Flask in Hampstead, Flask Walk NW3.
We apologise for this mistake.