SOME GIRLS ARE BIGGER THAN OTHERS
Lyric Hammersmith

THE school bullies used to have a ‘wrestling’ move known as The Sleeper. It involved putting a first year, not me, into a dozy trance by locking arms around the neck while simultaneously rubbing the forehead.
I’d forgotten about The Sleeper until sitting through the ordeal of Some Girls Are Bigger Than Others, an art house musical using songs by Morrissey and The Smiths. Sinking low in my seat, I realised in horror this show is the stage equivalent of being caught in The Sleeper hold.
Within minutes, you feel disorientated, sapped of energy and dizzy.
It’s a series of musical mini-dramas but it’s difficult to get to grips with any of them. Too much going on, the players clutter the stage with distractions.
Should you be looking at the man in a rabbit suit, the girl on the trapeze or the flickering rave visuals?
And if you can explain what it all means and soothe the aching pain left in my head, lunch is on me. I was clearly not the only one lost and you got the impression that Morrissey fans might feel a little swizzed by this experiment. The singer was a moaning old grump but at least we kind of understood what he was banging on about. I wonder what he makes of it all.
Some escapees began sneaking out after just half an hour, deadened by the below par harmonising and not willing to fidget through another hour. I was rather jealous, for it was already clear that the production could only have worked as a 10-minute short.
In fact, it felt like the cast had been locked in a smug school drama class for a couple of years, coming out feeling very pleased with themselves but without really knowing what their work meant for the rest of us. It meant The Sleeper.
It took great resolve not to break the never leave before the end rule – but somehow the survivors in the stalls made it through.

Until July 23
0870 050 0511