UH-OH! I’m in big trouble with the Spurs fans again.
Last week I dared to suggest that Tottenham might consider the Intertoto Cup as a possible trail into Europe.
Cue indignant whining: “We’ve already said we are not going to enter.” Calm down. I was only trying to help.
I thought Tottenham would have jumped at the chance of going abroad for the first time since Chas and Dave played their World Tour of Belgium in 1988.
Simply saying they are not going to enter the Intertoto Cup, however, doesn’t erase the fact that Tottenham always emerge as the obvious contenders to represent England in this also-rans trophy.
In fact, when I think of the Intertoto Cup, I automatically think of Tottenham. It’s become a reflex reaction. Word association: Tottenham – Intertoto.
Anyway, the mediocre talent of Noe Pamarot would be perfect for the competition.
And who knows? Tottenham might win it – no doubt touring north London in an open top bus afterwards. It’s a great idea.
If readers get together maybe we can convince Martin Pumpkinhead to change his mind.
Let’s start a petition and write to MPs. The campaign starts here.
Give Tottenham what it wants: Intertoto!

I REALISED this week that there’s more to the modern footballer than shopping, fast cars, disco-dancing and silly haircuts.
They actually spend time thinking about the beautiful game. Take Rio Ferdinand for example.
This week, while lovingly tending the tumbleweed in the section of his trophy cabinet marked West Ham, the cleverest man in Manchester mused something along the lines of: ‘It doesn’t matter if you play rubbish, so long as you win’.
He was of course talking about winning the World Cup, but it’s good to see Rio’s total football theory has been slavishly applied by his team mates over at the Theatre of Cheating Keepers this season.
Shame they haven’t got to grips with the winning part often enough. Not.
Still, they did manage it when it mattered I suppose. Their ending of Arsenal’s unbeaten run back in October has to have been one of the most enjoyable days this term.
But I’m getting ahead of myself. The title may be on its way out of Highbury, but the season isn’t over yet.
There are still seven more league games left and that’s seven more chances for Arsenal to play rubbish and still win.
Because when it comes to that theory, the Gunners are currently top of the class.