ARSENAL put up an impressive defence of their signing policy this week. “We’d sign a troll with three eyes if he was a good footballer,” said a scout.
I suppose the first half of that statement explains Pascal Cygan’s arrival at Highbury. But will it appease those unhappy that for a small part of Tuesday’s match, it was the team from Germany who fielded the only Englishman? Still, there were plenty of trolls on show and wasn’t it lovely to see Oliver Kahn in such a jolly mood?
Even lovelier was the friendly wave Jens Lehmann gave Germany’s No 1 during the game. Shame he decided to do it just as Saslihamidzic was bearing down on him to score Bayern’s THIRD goal.
Judging by Lehmann’s Rooneyesque mutterings afterwards, he was a tad embarrassed. Although not as embarrassed as the Arsenal fans who flounced out of the pub I watched the match in were. Cheer up Gooners, your Invisibles will get a second chance to show us their world-class clowning. Hopefully Chelsea’s quadruple dreams will have downsized even further by then too.
Because if Gooners’ glum faces were a picture on Tuesday, they were nothing compared to Brian Clough Junior’s at St James’s Park on Sunday. Priceless? I should say so.

EARLIER on this season I took Liverpool on at 66-1 to win the Champions League. It was a crazy punt – they were teetering and looked like they were on the way out. The bet now looks quite good value.
Osley fans will bristle.
Why didn’t I keep the faith and put my hard-earned fiver on Arsenal? Well, as Paul Daniels once whispered to Debbie McGee: “You can’t win the Champions League with Pascal Cygan in your defence.” The little wizard was right.
On Tuesday night, Wenger was caught out not only with Cygan, who learned everything he knows about defending from Gus Caesar, but also Jens Lehmann who might think about checking whether he is Arsenal’s number one before worrying about the German national team.
End result: We all now know what it feels like to be a Tottenham fan, heading towards the business end of the season with all hopes pinned on a miserable FA Cup replay.
Ashburton Grove is costing a mint but surely there must have been a way of bringing in a goalkeeper, a centre back and maybe even a new strike partner for Thierry.
It’s all ruined a week in which we should have been chuckling at Jose Mourinho’s cup bungle against Newcastle on Sunday.